Imagine a sudden swirl of colored lights in your rear-view mirror, accompanied by a klaxon of sirens.
Imagine thinking that it was more productive to drive through a second stop sign, without stopping,because you were near your destination and it made more sense to you to get to where you were going and then deal with the problem.
Imagine you are driving a Cadillac Escalade with a large, beaten up, flat-bed trailer bouncing along behind and, by the time you reach your place of business, you are being closely followed by the original black and white police cruiser and two other back-up vehicles who have been called in and come screaming to join the chase.
Imagine your surprise when several angry officers are yelling at you to keep your hands visible on the steering wheel and they won't let you get out of your car, preventing you from opening the gate around the storage area for the person you were late meeting, who had decided to jump the fence and just about wet himself thinking the sirens were coming for him.
Imagine their surprise when you ask, "Parlez vous francais?"
Kitchen
5 hours ago
Across the room from me, learning forward on his little bar stool is a Frenchman with a large white moustache who is actually laughing out loud, pausing to think about my insta-translaton of your post, and, then, laughing out loud again.
ReplyDeleteSo, did they arrest him? Did they take him to the Graybar Hotel? Did they get the chase on the 6 o'clock news?
Or did they quickly realize that the driver of said Cadillac Escalade was just an old rogue French Artist set loose in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave with a penchant for flouting its rules of the road with regularity?
I can hardly wait to hear Part 2. There will be a Part 2, n'est-ce pas?
An End of the Year Word Gift for You:
ReplyDeleteI don't even like old cars. I'd rather have a goddam horse. A horse is at least human, for God's sake.
–J.D. Salinger
One hopes this story has a sequel. I am already imagining all kinds of possibilities.
ReplyDeleteIs this a recent event or a past transgression?
How do you say "Scofflaw" in francais?
ReplyDeleteSilliyak, That's easy "Bernard" is the direct translation of scofflaw into French.
ReplyDeleteJean, This is a golden oldy. One more trip to Tragic School.
Pliers, I'm amazed there are legends that you have not yet been bored with. He was not arrested, although he had called me from his cell so I could enjoy the experience with him and possibly translate some Cop-Speak. It was taking a while to scan all possible data bases for news of My Special Moron and he kept forgetting he wasn't allowed out of his car. They kept yelling and putting him back in.
I will always wonder what they thought of him fleeing with an empty trailer, up a cul de sac.
Another one:
ReplyDeleteHorses make a landscape look beautiful.
–Alice Walker
Oh yes, part 2 please. Happy New Year and thanks for the stories!! x
ReplyDeleteOK... So where are you? It's December 31st. Are you preparing for an evening with the feral grandchildren? I shouldn't encourage you in such a low opinion of your outlaws offspring, but...
ReplyDeleteDi, glad to have you along for the ride. I wish I didn't have such a panoply of vehicle and husband related stories to choose from :)
ReplyDeleteMs. Pliers, I am in my office, where else would I be? Friends are on the menu for this evening, not family.
This made me laugh. I can't wait for part 2...
ReplyDeleteShattered, my life is never boring (by association, if nothing else) but I never turn off my phone in the evening until my hubby makes it home and I think of him whenever I hear sirens in the distance. Did I mention, he's not seventeen? He's almost seventy-four! Wishing for change would obviously be futile.
ReplyDeleteSo funny! Thanks for the giggle..
ReplyDeleteMichelle, we share the world with some very "special" people!
ReplyDeleteThe cops here do go a bit over top don't they?
ReplyDeleteI am picturing the typical frenchman in his beret and striped shirt, driving a Renault 4.
Too funny
Dave, For all those cops could tell they were chasing down Jacques le Ripper!
ReplyDelete